Trauma

do you want to read about my traumatic experience? well... a few weeks after we got back i decided to do what i have been talking about doing for a long while now. i cut my hair. i CUT my hair. I CUT ALL MY HAIR OFF! i was scared to do it but i did it. shawn told me to do whatever i wanted to do, "just don't cry". on wednesday i cut it to my neck. on thursday i went back and said i wanted the sienna miller haircut.

 they cut it. and... i love it!! seriously, i was so excited about my new haircut. it kind of gave me a new attitude. i liked my new hair attitude. kind of fearless. kind of glamorous. and everyone else liked it too. except my friend katie, but at least she was honest. shawn liked it just fine... not love... but liked it at least.

i wish i could stop there and just be telling you about my cute new haircut... but...

a few weeks went by... lets get to thursday of this week. i decided i needed a little tiny trim, you know, since my hair is so short it grows fast and needs to be trimmed often. despite what my smart friends told me, i was convinced i needed the trim. after all, we have a wedding to go to this weekend. so off i go to the salon. i get there. they say, "i think you should go all over blonde." you know, like the michelle williams short hair cut.

 and i say, "whatever you think", not thinking about my baby fine hair. if i had thought it through, i would have realized that bleach blond, thin hair will show right through to my scalp. DUH BIZ!  so they wash and dry it. yikes! yikes! yikes! my hair is a translucent white shining right through to my scalp. not even a color. . "um, can we please put some low lights or something in it?" i know nothing about hair stuff so i really had no idea just how bad this situation was. she added a few low lights. wash and dried it again. now i have an orange tint in the front. the back, still white slash clear. i had been there a while. i was tired and still didn't realize how bad this was. but i still needed trim. or so i thought. she trimmed and i realized, i didn't need a trim and now it was just short and weird. should have listened to my smart friends.

can you picture just where we are now? it was bad. i am really non confrontational and have never been that picky about my hair only because i've never really had that many options considering thin, blonde, curly hair just doesn't do a whole lot. so i left, not really thinking there was anything worth trying fix. i went to a AM's for dinner. walked in the door and she freaked! said, "go back now!"  it was worse than i even knew. shawn was spending his first night away with "the guys". i had time... so i got back to the salon. "um hi. if you... have time... today... would you be able... maybe... to put a few more low lights in or something?.. i just... think it's a little too blonde."

for future wisdom... when you are at this point... stop STOP!! there really is no "fixing" it. just grow it out and try again later rather than adding to the mess.

i didn't know that thursday afternoon at 5:30. "just darken it up a little please". she put a glaze on it. what the heck is a glaze? a glaze just "pulls some of the yellow out". glaze. wash and dry again. my head was burning and i was dizzy. (it's still sore) so now, i don't even know what color my hair is. it's definitely got a reddish, orange tint but still translucent to my scalp. "um, i still don't like it, can you put some more low lights or something in it?" rinse and dry again. i asked her not to wash it with shampoo this time... my hair can not handle any more. the added low lights did not help. both me and the stylist were tired and defeated.

i went home. i cried. and cried. and cried and cried. i went to bed. i woke up, looked in the mirror and cried.  i showered. washed and dried it AGAIN. i cried. telling myself, "it's just hair, no big deal, it will grow out..." and i cried.

i felt awful to go back to the same stylist again because she probably felt worse than i did. i called a color miracle worker...shawn came home. i cried. we hugged. i drove BACK to mt. pleasant. she dyed my hair brown, though it looks green because of whatever color is underneath. she fixed the cut as best she could. it's SHORT. and brown.

and it's just hair.

i will have to upload one of my brown hair when i am ready for people to see me this way.